Entry tags:
[Endgame: rise or DROWN]
[How long have you been exploring Nessa's palace now? You've met her family, viewed her memories, learned how to fight as a witch and tried to find the source of her power and the Treasure of her palace: the Voidheart. And along the way, you've tired your best, with mixed success, to avoid the incarnation of her eldest cousin and the representation of her trauma and fear, the Nightmare of Esmau.]
[Wherever you are in the Palace right now, you feel the ground briefly shake under your feet. Little shakes here and there haven't been out of the ordinary - Esmau is trying to blow the place down to the studs, after all. But that felt different. That felt....worse.]
[Your phone beeps as you receive a message.]
[Wherever you are in the Palace right now, you feel the ground briefly shake under your feet. Little shakes here and there haven't been out of the ordinary - Esmau is trying to blow the place down to the studs, after all. But that felt different. That felt....worse.]
[Your phone beeps as you receive a message.]

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everyone.
she jolts from reverie and spins on her hands and knees. Tsumugi—alive. Minato—?! hurt, but... alive. Akira, alive too. they're shapes in the room to her, more than they are people, just shapes she's counting to make sure everything's as it should be.
her gaze swings around, then, to that far end of the room. three shapes. that's all she sees at first: three shapes.
but the details start filling in after a moment. ]
N... Nnno. [ guttural, haggard. she staggers up and forward, wobbles, staggers up again, moves forward, none of it conscious, all of it instinct.
there's a body, and it isn't moving.
she staggers, wobbles, moves forward. at the end, she stumbles and pulls herself the last few feet on her palms, and sorry to Zarya and Shadow Nessa, but she barely even acknowledges them, for now. ] Lapochka.
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Zarya looks at Sprezzatura.]
...
...
I'm sorry, Sprezzatura Vaux.
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Sprezzatura Vaux. The only person here who never knew Nessa before she became a teenager.]
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in the next breath, she's weeping. ]
Nnnno. Oh, lapochka, no, no...
[ she doesn't just hold a hand to her mouth—she falls down over her like a cage, like a cradle, nestling the girl's body between Zarya's lap and her own, sobbing like she'll join her in her rest. is it terrible and selfish of her? of course. Sprezzatura Vaux is a terrible and selfish woman.
but this grief is very sincere. the Nessa she knew was doomed from the beginning; this was always going to be how it finished, you see. like burned books. like waking from a dream. ]
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And she pulls her off of Nessa and pushes her aside.]
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[And Shadow Nessa plunges her hand into her own chest.]
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—NO!!
[ the rulebook says. you can use Thunderstep in response to an attack during someone else's turn, and teleport yourself and up to one ally a short distance away. well. this is very clearly an attack, wouldn't you agree? and Nessa is definitely an ally.
for the vibes, Jeff. can she teleport Shadow Nessa and herself that short distance away? ]
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Get off of me.
[She still has her hand on her own chest.
...on the Voidheart.]
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Why... why do we need to have these impossible choice between you both when I have two arms?!
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There's only one Voidheart.
There can only be...
[Huff.]
One Nessa Houghton.
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Create a second one?
Go out and find the seven dragon balls??
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...
...
Fine.
Say there was a way to do it. To have two Nessas.
But you had to find it yourself, because it simply doesn't exist in Nessa's world. And even if you searched every universe out there, it may still be impossible.
Then what would you say?
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[give her a minute]
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you're going to ruin everything, Vaux. you're going to ruin everything. you're going to ruin everything, Vaux. you're going to ruin it all! ]
Don't you dare.
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...
You want her back.
Don't try to tell me you don't.
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Can I not grieve girl you were? [ her pain, her sacrifices—the monster inside her head. her voice is getting rawer, rougher: ] That is part of you, lying there! Piece of you has died to overcome those women—they who wished you erased for not being who they chose! You do not conquer Esmau just to put me in her place! You do not defer to anyone. Do you hear me?!
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'You do not conquer Esmau just to put me in her place!'
If she rips out the Voidheart and places it into that girl, what she said at the start will come true. There can only be one Voidheart and one Nessa Houghton. If the younger Nessa has the Voidheart, then she is Nessa Houghton. This Shadow will fade away...and the woman that she's a shadow of will fade away as well. If she does this because of Sprezzatura's grief, then Sprezzatura will have brought back the young Nessa...by doing away with the adult Nessa.
Another Esmau, ripping out Nessa's heart.
Another Lilith, taking away Nessa's choice for who she wants to be.
And leaving an ugly question in that Nessa's head forever: 'Am I only here because she couldn't let me go?'
One of Shadow Nessa's arms falls to her sides. She sucks in a breath through her nose. Realizing the cruel, cruel fate she almost consigned both Sprezzatura and Nessa too.
She reaches out and grabs Sprezzatura's collar. Her jaw sets with determination.]
Then don't be those women.
Lyra screwed up immensely by getting herself and Nessa trapped in that coven. She hated herself every day for a decade for the choices she made that led to having to raise her daughter under Lilith's thumb. But when her daughter needed her, she gave up something incredibly important to her to save what was most important to her - her daughter's life. To implant this Voidheart in her, to give her a second chance.
If you don't want to be Esmau -- by Nessa's mother, Lyra, instead.
Swallow your grief.
Swallow your pride.
Swallow your selfishness.
Withstand all of it.
Take your student.
Teach her to become a witch.
And both of you stand against Typhon and break it. And break its prison until you're both free.
Then the two of you scour the whole damn multiverse if you have to to find a way to bring Nessa back. Because guess what?
That's what Nessa wants.
No matter how many times I called that girl a fake, Nessa thought from the beginning that through her own choices, she had created a life, a life that made its own bonds and made its own choices and grew into something different from her. And the idea of stepping over that life and just sliding back into it as if nothing's changed is something she can't stand. Something that would make her into Esmau instead.
If you want to help Nessa?
Make a liar out of me. Make it so there can be two Nessa Houghtons. And until then, swallow your own pain for her sake, Sprezzatura Vaux.
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Wasn't that the point of this Palace all along?
He won't interrupt--this is Sprezzatura's moment, because Sprezzatura is every inch the guide he always knew she could be--but he is watching very closely, eyes wide. ]
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-- what are you doing?!
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Asking the obvious a bit there, aren't you?
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[wheezes]
Don't just rip your heart out like that because you're feeling guilty over what happened. . .!
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[... ... ...]
Okay, fine, maybe I do a little bit, but that's not what I'm doing this!
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Then why--?